Snows of Winter, Rains of Spring
by Joshua Reardon
Summary: Quistis and Rinoa confront each others feelings for Squall, even as the man lies dying in blood stained snow.
1. Out in the Cold

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Final Fantasy VIII. All such characters are copyrighted property of Squaresoft.

**Snows of Winter, Rains of Spring**

By Joshua Reardon

**Chapter 1: Out in the Cold**

The wind howled out of the mountains and down the shear cliff face. Its biting sting was enough to make the lone figure walking the trail, hunch against the cold. It had been blowing like this since he had left the small hamlet nestled in the foot of the lower hills some two hours ago. He berated himself silently for not preparing better, but like so much in his life, it had been a spur of the moment decision to come here.

Squall Leonhart was not a man to run from much, if anything, but over the last few months, a virus had been worming its way through his system, eating away at his self-reliability. He chided himself for thinking of her like that, this woman that he supposedly loved. 

Rinoa Heartily. They had become so much more than just simple friends, if they had ever been something so limiting as that title. After the defeat of Ultimecia and the return from time compression, his life became a whirlwind, even more than normal for a SeeD, the best of the best. He found himself being unable to do the slightest of tasks without thinking of her, without wondering what she was doing at that exact same instant. It was those thoughts that scared him the most.

He had been simply walking along the corridors of Balamb Garden, the monolithic proportions of the institute long since losing any awe in his mind, when thoughts of her began flitting through his head. Her face, her eyes dancing in his mind to a waltz only his ears could hear. Just like the night they had met, under the stars. He could still hear her faint laughter at his ineptitude on the dance floor. The feel of the silk of her dress under his hands as they finally found a rhythm even he could move to. And her eyes, always on him, hinting at some secret that had to be uncovered.

He was interrupted from his musings in the hall by a group of students, giggling over something. His ears finally caught their words;

"There goes the love-struck Commander".

They were laughing at him. They had been admiring him up until two months ago, and now they were laughing at him? He couldn't believe he had made such an ass of himself. He was nothing more than some doting puppy, trailing after Rinoa, hoping for some scraps.

His mind screamed at the thought of losing himself in another. Would this be how it always was going to turn out? For the sake of happiness, would he lose his identity completely? What _was_ his identity? _Commander_ Leonhart? He hated that title. Would it be better to be 'Rinoa's lap-dog'? Could he never just be Squall?

He had to get away, to think, to live a life that wasn't defined by the company he kept. And there was that spur of the moment decision making that got him into so much trouble in the past. He strode straight for the Headmaster's office.

In the two months following the last Sorceress War, Garden had become a non-profit organization, or at least was in the process of transferring over. The world governments had seen fit to make Garden, and by extension SeeD, accessible to everyone who needed them, and so set about appointing Garden as a sort of world-wide response agency. Each government now contributed a portion of their yearly wealth to Garden. Each county retained its own army but Garden was assumed to be a special task force for international purposes.

Now the missions were flooding in and there weren't enough SeeDs to accomplish them all. Some of the more minor ones had even been pushed to the wayside. One such mission was in a tiny hamlet in the eastern forests of Trabia, at the foot of the Mjornir Mountains, on the Thor Peninsula.

Striding into the Headmaster's office, Squall demanded to be sent somewhere, anywhere as long as it was far from here. Cid Kramer could only shake his head. He had known Squall for quite some time, and could see when he was running away from something, and he was guessing it was a certain 17 year-old girl.

"Running never solved anything Squall", the Headmaster chided, knowing his words were falling on deaf ears.

"Whatever". The simplicity of his reply left no room for argument. "I'm going crazy here sir, I need to do something".

"Well, I imagine you probably want to go alone, so you can have every possibility of getting horribly killed", a slight nod was his only response, obviously paying no heed to the biting sarcasm. "Very well, you can help me finish some of this back-log, and besides, if I send you to the most gods-awful place I possibly can, maybe you won't be so keen on darting off next time".

Again, "whatever."

"Trabia Garden had to give us this one, what with all the rebuilding going on, so on and so forth", he said, reaching for a sheet of paper in a very full in-basket. "Seems a small village on the outskirts of the continent is having some dragon trouble. The villagers report a great Ruby Dragon coming out of the Mjornirs to terrorize their little hamlet. I don't hold much stock in it", he snorted,"Ruby's don't like the cold much, but apparently the little town is quite adamant."

"I'll leave immediately sir", he stated with no emotion in his voice what-so-ever.

"Now no need for that. Take a day or two, put your affairs in order and report to the tasking office then".

"I'll leave _immediately_ sir", he stated once again, rather more emphatically.

Cid could only shake his head. "You're obviously upset about something", he said, his voice trying to convey concern. "Son, you shouldn't leave like this". Even as the words were leaving his mouth he knew they would have no impact. '_Damn the boy'_, he thought, '_he can be so stubborn at times'_.

"You'll have my report on your desk in a few days, sir." With that, he curtly saluted, turned on his heel and strode out of the office.

After confirming his assignment with the tasking office, he left without so much as a word to anyone. 

As the Ragnarok's engine thrummed into high speed over Garden, Cid could only look out his window and wish the boy would find the answers he didn't know he was looking for.

So here he was, on a mountain in the middle of nowhere, two hours out, away from the simplest of comforts. Not that he had ever needed those comforts, but at least a heavy jacket would have been nice. The fur lining the collar of his leather coat having long since turned to ice. 

He had come out here to escape his thoughts, but found them waiting like a viper in the hedge, ready to spring and inject their venom once more. And he couldn't get _her_ out of his mind either.

It had started to snow now, which certainly didn't help his disposition or his situation. Snow would cover any tracks left by the dragon, if it hadn't just flown down on its murderous rampage. He had seen that carnage first hand.

When he had first arrived at the sleepy hamlet of Odin's Vale, he had found it anything but. Buildings were charred and ruined, a few still on fire, while a number of villagers were desperately trying to put it out, with of all things, a bucket line. Looking around, he could see wisps of smoke trailing off of charred hunks that they had failed at. There were a few people at one end of the main road, weeping over a large pit, while a priest of Hyne intoned verse in an ancient language.

Reeling from the scene of so much tragedy, he joined in the bucket line before his mind completely shut down. '_Give me something to do_,' he thought, '_so I don't have to think'. _

The villagers were only too happy to have another on the line, even though Squall knew it was a fool's errand. The house was too far gone, but maybe they could prevent the fire from spreading to the surrounding buildings, those fortunate enough to escape the fire's indiscriminate hate.

An hour later, the last of the fires had been quelled. Squall finally sat down on the porch of a building that _used_ to be there. He had taken off his jacket in the face of the fires heat and now was completely covered in soot and ash. His face was almost black except for lines that beads of sweat had made as they traveled down his brow and temple. He was exhausted, but he could see the toll the carnage had taken on the villagers was even greater.

A man similarly blackened from the fire approached him. He was tall and had the bearing of a leader about him.

"Thanks for the help stranger. We don't get many big city boys around here. What's your name?" he asked in an easy going manner, offering his hand in a shake.

Squall hesitantly looked at the man and his hand. "Leonhart, from Garden" he said ignoring the proffered handshake.

"From Garden? Well, it's about time. We've only been requesting help for over a month now" he said, a small amount of venom in his voice, but his smile returned as he turned back to Squall.

"Well, it's good that you're here now, anyway. We've sorely needed someone to help with this mess we're in." he stated, looking around at the devastation. "I'm Cail Longhorn, people around here call me the mayor but I don't know why", he said with a smirk upon his face.

"I don't think now is the time to be cracking jokes, sir" Squall stated in an almost derisive tone.

"Son, if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to keep going right now. It keeps me from thinking about all the friends I've buried in the last week" the mayor retorted, his voice like that of a man who has accepted defeat, once too often.

"I'm sorry, sir". Squall could relate, if not so much with the laughter part, but certainly he had found ways to avoid tragedy in his life. "Do you have a place left standing that I could clean up?"

"Unfortunately, the charred, burned out husk you're sitting on used to be our only inn". He scanned the remains with almost a wistful look on his blackened face, memories rising to the surface from long ago. "I guess I'll have to put you up at my house".

The last thing Squall wanted was to get close to these people or any people at this time. He just wanted to do his job, why did they never let him just do his job?

"I wouldn't want to put you out, sir".

"Nothing to do about it, everyone else is full up with all these houses gone. The townsfolk have given me some space what with my fami…. with my loss. Everybody's lost someone now and all that space doesn't make much sense for one man. Might as well make use of it". Squall could here the unspoken words. '_My family's death'_.

Squall prevaricated for a moment, and finally relented. "Alright".

Cail turned toward the young SeeD. "Well, alright then. You got some luggage I could help you with?"

"Just this", he patted a long rectangular case that had been left at the inn's stoop, "and I've got it".

Squall stood somewhat wearily and began to follow the mayor. Retrieving his jacket, they began to make their way along the now desolate road. Most of the villagers had retreated to what was left of their homes. Squall marveled at the amount of devastation, the scorched homes, and finally, the mass grave. His mind began to reel again, but he berated himself for his weakness. He had seen worse he told himself, much worse. '_But it never gets easier'_.

"So it really was a Ruby", he mumbled.

"Pardon?" asked the mayor, cocking his head sideways.

"….nothing, sir". It seemed almost morbid to tell the true reason that SeeD hadn't responded sooner, in the face of so much tragedy. How could he tell this man, who had watched friends immolated before his eyes, that the reason he hadn't come sooner was that no one believed them?

Cail looked at him with a reprimanding face. "Now knock that off, my name is Cail", he chided jokingly, "you're making me sound old".

"Hmph….Squall", the young SeeD replied, almost too low to hear.

"I know", Cail answered, to a rather stunned Squall. "You were involved in that Sorceress business a few months back, I'm interested but I didn't want to pry".

_'Well, you're the first'_, thought Squall. Everyone always wanted to know. What was facing Ultimecia like, what was the future like, how did you escape time compression? That last topic brought a certain girl back to his mind, something he was trying to escape for the moment. He shook his thoughts away before they lingered.

It was truly amazing to find a place where people may have cared about the incident, but weren't clawing at him for the answers. Maybe these people were just so busy trying to survive that the answers just didn't matter. Maybe this was just the place he needed to be right now, somewhere that it just didn't matter.

They walked the rest of the way in silence. They eventually came upon a small house not too far out of the way. The residence was two stories, with a small yard piled high with snow. The walk was clear though. Squall could see how the dragon had missed it. It was just far enough away from the main town area to be out of sight and yet not a great pain to walk into town.

Cail led him in through the front door, a small opening in the bottom, a flap presumably for some quaint family animal. As they went up the stairs, Squall looked upon the numerous photos lining the wall. Always the happy family. What was that like, a happy family? Would he ever know? '_Do I care?_'

"You can stay in the guest room here, it's not much, but something tells me you won't be staying long anyway". Cail gestured to a room on his left, "heads are in there, you can clean up".

Setting the case on the bed, he went into the bathroom. He noticed immediately that the room still had a woman's touch. _'She died recently, maybe even to the dragon'_ the thought weighing heavy on his mind.

He set about cleaning himself up. There wasn't much he could do about his shirt, but it's not like he was on parade or anything. As he was cleaning the soot off his arms, his hand stopped and held still. What if Rinoa had been the one lost, would be able to go on, like Cail had? What would be the purpose?

Once again he angrily shook away the thought, focusing on scrubbing with a vengeance. When he was done his arms were red.

He went back to the room, striding up to the bed and just looked at the case, its black leather like midnight on a summer eve. The silver lions head, shining like a star streaking through the heavens. He opened the case.

Blue steel shone with an inner fire, as Lion Heart was revealed to the room. The wickedly keen blade, holding so much malice in its simple form. Something about this sword sung in his heart, promising violence to those who would have it.

As he pulled the blade from the case, he could feel the strength in the weapon, an ancient power stretching back centuries. He attached the charge revolver and swung the blade tentatively, going through a motion he had practiced for over ten years. His swing gaining momentum and strength with every pass until his movements were a blur to the untrained eye. Suddenly he stopped dead, the blade inches from his face. He brought the sword down in a knightly salute, pressing his forehead to the flat of the blade.

There was some connection between him and this weapon. Some primal force binding them together. The longer he held the sword, the more it felt like an extension of his body, and when he let it go, it was like losing a limb, like having his arm removed at the elbow.

"I haven't seen a gunblade in a long time, and never one so fine as that". Squall's musings were interrupted by a voice from the door frame. 

"I fought very long and very hard for this", he said, not knowing why he was revealing this intimate detail. "It is a part of me".

"It may be a part of you, but don't let it become you", Cail warned, and in a small voice he continued, "Hyne knows I learned that the hard way".

Silence stretched between them until the older man broke the veil, "I would go with you, if you asked for help. It is a great beast, I have seen it. You need not be alone".

Knowing despair when he heard it he realized Cail hadn't gone on, he was just surviving. To his obvious death-wish, he replied, "it's not your time".

Nodding, Cail let it drop. He watched as the young SeeD made his way down the stairs and to the front door. He paused with one hand on the door handle, the other lightly resting on Lion Heart in its holster, "thank you for the hospitality", he said without ever turning around.

"You're welcome".

With that, Squall opened the door and left.

Now, two hours out and still no sign of the great beast. The snow effectively covering any tracks left in its wake, and the continuing flurries blocking his line of sight, he was very rapidly losing control in a situation where control was necessary for survival.

Through the blowing wind and flakes he could make out a tree line in the distance. He made his way toward the safety of cover and perhaps a small haven from the ravages of the weather.

As he entered the safety of the pines, the wind began to lessen and the snow fell almost lazily through the brush, taking its time to arrive on earth. The trees seemed to go on endlessly, white, brown and green for as far as the eye could see. It was beautiful in a deadly way, like Shiva in all her glory. An icy beauty destined to freeze your heart.

How much Rinoa would like this, this vast beauty.

There she was again, stealing into his thoughts like a thief in the night. He did love her didn't he? Would one simple joke be enough to drive him away if he did? If he was being truthful with himself, and he believed he finally was, it was never the joke. It was how close they were becoming. If he let it continue, would it come to a point where he wouldn't even be able to survive without her? Would he be like Cail, wishing to die, just to take the pain away? Would he have the courage to find out, or would he continue to run, just like all the other times.

He needed to get back to her, to see her again, to feel her lustrous hair through his finger tips. The soft touch of her lips. He truly needed her, and suddenly, he wasn't afraid.

A loud crash broke his reverie as the ground began to tremble. Footfalls like thunder crashing in the distance preceded it. It was enormous, this giant ancient thing, its body stretching back through the trees it had destroyed in its wake. Red plates glittered along its length, shining from the reflection off the snow. Its head was massive, large enough to swallow a man whole in one bite, and it was hungry. Steam rose from its mouth as it opened its jaws slightly, saliva dripping off enormous fangs as long as his forearm. Its talons rent the earth in great furrows as its tail thrashed, destroying trees older than Squall by a hundred years. Suddenly, Squall knew a different kind of fear, and it was staring him in the face.

A voice, ancient as time broke into his thoughts, sweeping away hope and stealing his resolve.

_'You will die squirming between my teeth, Man-thing, even as my breath melts the flesh from your bones'_. Its mouth hadn't moved, but the words had come from the beast.

The final thought to flit through Squall's mind before the last, was of her.

_'Rinoa, I love you'_.


	2. Waking Nightmare

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Final Fantasy VIII. All such characters are copyrighted property of Squaresoft.

**Snows of Winter, Rains of Spring**

By Joshua Reardon

**Chapter 2: Waking Nightmare**

She awoke screaming, her piercing shriek shattering the night stillness. She could still feel the razor sharp talons slicing through her breast and piercing her heart. She unconsciously grabbed at her chest to feel for the wound. There was nothing there.

Rinoa Heartily couldn't understand how the dream had been so real. Even now, fully awake, she could still smell a faint waft of the great beast's breath, fetid with the smell of rotting flesh. She quickly scrambled out of bed and ran to the bathroom sink, heaving up the lovely honeyed pork she had had for supper.

Washing out the sink, she flushed her mouth and splashed water on her face, the cool liquid doing little to soothe her inner turmoil. She was trembling with fear and she couldn't understand why. She looked at herself in the mirror; the same features she had seen for seventeen years stared back her. Her face was flushed from vomiting her last meal, but otherwise everything seemed normal. So why couldn't she shake this impending sense of dread that hung over her?

She was shaken from her thoughts by a hurried rap at the door, and a voice.

"Rinoa, are you alright?" She could faintly make out Selphie's voice through the door.

Opening the door, she saw the spunky young girl standing there in flannel pajamas with a very concerned look upon her face. For a second, her mind couldn't process why Selphie would be wearing flannel in this heat, and before she knew it, her mouth had asked that very question.

Her face broke out in smiles and giggles. "When you live in minus forty degree weather for most of your life, you learn to bundle up when you go to bed. I got so used to them it's almost impossible for me to sleep now without them." Still laughing, she pleaded, "now are you gonna let me in or what?"

Moving aside, she let the young SeeD into the room, the door sliding shut behind her with barely a whisper.

"What happened? I could hear you screaming through the wall" Selphie said, her face gaining the concerned look once more. 

"I…" she was about to tell her all about the dream, but it was just too disturbing at the moment, the very thought causing her stomach to rise. "Just had a bad dream, that's all. I'm sorry if I woke you Selph."

Selphie looked at her with a skeptical glance. "That must have been one heckuva bad dream. Did you want to talk about it?" concern once again in her eyes. She took a seat on the bed, curling up with her feet under her, waiting for the whole story.

"Not really Selph, it kinda left a bad taste in my mouth". '_Literally_', she thought, still unable to linger long on the thought of the dream.

Rinoa went and took a seat on the bed as well, next to her friend. She began talking without realizing. 

"It was just so real" she said, almost against her will. "This…thing was chasing me through snow and trees, and it was so cold I could hardly breathe and then it sprang on me and blood was everywhere and all I could think was how much I needed Squall and he wasn't there and-".

"Whoa, whoa, slow down, you're hyper-ventilating. Take some deep breaths Rin." 

Rinoa inhaled slowly and steadily, letting her anxiety over the nightmare fade away. There was something very wrong with this. She couldn't place the problem, but it was there. Why should she react so to a dream? A disturbing dream, but still just smoke and mist. Was this a sorceress problem? Were all her dreams going to so tangible from now on?

Selphie broke her musings. "Do you need anything Rin, can I get you anything?"

Rinoa just shook her head. "I just need to talk to Squall I think". He would probably be as stumped about the dream as her, but at least she could take comfort in him just being there.

Selphie reached around and rubbed Rinoa's back, putting her arm on her shoulder. "No worries, I'm sure he'll be back in a few days", she said.

It took a few moments for the words to properly register with Rinoa's distracted mind. '_A few days?_' 

"What do you mean 'He'll be back'?" she asked. "Where is he?" A small twinge of fear suddenly sliced through her.

"He… he's in Trabia, on a mission" Selphie replied, with trepidation in her voice. "He left this morning."

Rinoa was shocked, she couldn't understand. Why hadn't he told her? '_Unless he's running away from me_' she thought, sadly. She turned to Selphie.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She almost shouted at the young SeeD, hurt plainly showing on her face.

"We… we thought you knew Rinny. He didn't tell any of us either, but we all thought he had at least told you."

Rinoa couldn't believe this, any of it. How could he just leave and not tell anyone, especially her. Pain lanced through her heart, spearing it like a javelin in a target. She clutched her chest, feeling that talon from her dream all over again, only for a completely different reason. The pain was no less though. Thinking on the dream, she slowly came to a realization.

Wiping the beginnings of tears from her eyes, she spoke, uncertainly. "You said he went to Trabia right?" A thought was forming and she hoped that it wouldn't be true.  

"Yeah, I don't know the specifics but it was supposed to just be this small town problem. He…he couldn't be in trouble could he-"

Rinoa never heard the rest, as she was already out the door running. She had to see Cid, had to find out where Squall had gone.

As she bolted down the corridors of Garden, time seemed to slow around her and somehow she couldn't run fast enough. Thoughts whirled through her heard at a frenzied pace, mocking the slowness that engulfed her. The dream couldn't be a coincidence. Nothing with them ever was. Something bound them inexorably together, something that tied their threads of fate into an intricate knot so strong it had once defied the flows of time. Would it now be enough to defy death itself?

                                                *          *          *          *

She could feel the gentle vibration of the train as she leaned her head against the wall. Closing her eyes, she could remember a trip not so long ago, a journey that began with another train ride. She reached up and brushed a blond tress out of her eyes and behind her ear, chiding herself for dwelling on the past.

Quistis Trepe wasn't one to normally linger on things that had come and gone, but that one afternoon had been the last time that she had been with Squall before he met _her_. No, that wasn't quite true. There had been the dance of course. He hadn't even known her name and he was still more open to Rinoa than he had ever been with her. Pushing her glasses up to the bridge of her nose, she looked at the girl in question, Rinoa Heartilly.

How they had become friends was beyond her. There was just something about Rinoa that you couldn't help liking. She was so outgoing and free, but with a strength few could match. She understood how Squall could have been drawn to her, like a moth to a flame. There were a lot of things she would never understand about Squall, but his attraction to Rinoa was not one of them. Maybe that's what really drew him to her. Maybe, some how, she could connect with him in a way Quistis never could. Oh but how she had tried. 'If only's' ran through her head in a mass stream, and she quickly shook them away. No sense dwelling on what could have been.

"I can't believe I let you drag me into this" Quistis said, in mock outrage.

Rinoa turned to her and smiled. "If I remember correctly, it was you who came up to me and told me, in no uncertain terms mind you, that if I didn't let you come you were going to thump me over the head until I listened to reason." 

"I'm sure I said no such thing." Quistis couldn't help but smile. "Well, maybe a rap or two, but no thumps."

Rinoa looked at her, and a seriousness took over her features that belied her seventeen years. "Thank you for coming Quistis, I don't think I could've done this alone. I just can't shake the feeling that Squall is in danger."

Quistis got up from her seat and moved across the car. The private SeeD car was spacious, with a décor reminiscent of Galbadian taste. She went over and sat beside her friend, facing the window. She watched as the landscape flashed by, greens giving way to white as snow overtook the terrain.

"Well, someone had to come keep an eye on you. Don't worry Rin" she patted her hand, hoping to relieve some of the stress her friend was burdened with, "we'll find him, safe and sound."

"Thanks Quistis." She looked toward the older woman, "I hope I didn't cause too much trouble just leaving like I did."

"No… no trouble at all Rin" she answered, with only a small grimace.

                                                *          *          *          *

"Well, she can't go alone!" Selphie almost screamed in Irving's face, which was quite the feat, seeing as how the dapper marksman had almost a foot on her in height.

"I'm not saying that," Irving countered, in frustration. "All I'm saying is that we can't go with her. You know the rules say three level-A SeeDs must be on call at any given time and with Zell away on leave and Xu still only level 28, that leaves us and only us three." He made a sweeping gesture taking in her and Quistis alike.

"Since when do give a damn about rules!?!" Selphie retorted, even more vehemently, throwing her entire small frame into the argument.

Quistis could only shake her head in annoyance. This had been going on for the last fifteen minutes, ever since Selphie had barged into her room dragging Irving along like a rag-doll, to tell them all that Rinoa was going to Trabia to find Squall. Selphie had said Rinoa had had a dream, a nightmare more like, of Squall dying in the snow. Quistis had been skeptical, but also couldn't deny that the thought of Squall in danger had sent a sliver of fear to flower in heart. And it was beginning to grow like a thorn.

Quistis shook her fears away and turned back to the argument continuing to grow in her sitting room. She looked at the two SeeDs. For all that they were spitting thunder at each other right now, in an hour they would be back to holding hands and stealing kisses in darkened passageways. She almost felt jealous that they had found something in each other worth holding on to. 

She needed desperately to know that Rinoa was wrong, that Squall was alright, that his blood wasn't turning the snows of Trabia to a crimson hue. She couldn't deny these wants and feelings, but also she wanted to protect her friend.

"I'm going with her." Her sudden outburst after long minutes of silence was enough to cause the other two to pause and stare.

"…What?" Both Irving and Selphie stared at the young blond, dumbfounded.

Quistis stared back at them, determination burning in her azure eyes. "I'm going, and I don't care about the rules. Rinoa needs help."

"Then I'm going too" Selphie said looking triumphantly up at Irving and sticking out her tongue.

"No, you're not" Quistis replied, holding up a hand to stop Selphie's quick retort. "You and Irving need to stay here and make it look like I'm still in residence. I'll need you two to cover for me, take my classes and keep Cid from finding out."

"I don't like this Quisty," Irving looked at her, disapproval written all over his face. "Personally I don't think Rinoa should even be going in the first place. Squall is a great fighter, hell, probably the best in all of Garden. There's not much that he can't handle."

"And what if he's found it, that one thing even he can't take?" She looked at her friends, her face a mask of calm. "Rinoa is going no matter what we say or what we do. She's that stubborn, always has been. The best we can do is help her. Are we agreed on this?"

Irving and Selphie looked at each other, and both turned back to Quistis and bobbed their heads in acknowledgement.

"Good, now get out so I can pack. It's damn cold in Trabia."

                                                *          *          *          *

As they stood on the train platform, the wind clawed at them with icy fingers. Rinoa huddled into her jacket. She could still remember the last time she had been here. The near destruction of Trabia Garden had been a devastating blow to SeeD, hundreds of students lost in one moment of fiery destruction. She could still remember the smell of the wreckage, the sickly sweet incense of charred flesh. She tried to push it to the back of her mind, but she couldn't help wondering how she could be only seventeen and have seen so much death.

Quistis looked at her friend, standing there, shivering in the chill wind. "Are you sure you want to do this Rin?"

"I can't turn back now Quistis," determination etched on her face. "I need to know that he's all right."

Quistis sighed in resignation. "Well, where do we start?"

"Cid said that Squall had gone to a small town called Odin's Vale." She reached into her pocket and brought out her organizer. She flipped it open and pushed a button. A small holographic map of the region came up, a red dot highlighting their position.

"It's supposed to be just at the foot of the Mjornir Mountains, right here," she indicated by pointing on the map.

"That's a bit of a ways," Quistis studied the map for a minute. "I don't relish the thought of traveling on foot".

Rinoa looked around at the Train station. There weren't that many shops. There was a restaurant on the far side called The Ice and Snow Pub, with a sign that proclaimed in large letters that they were 'fully licensed'. It didn't instill a great amount of hope in Rinoa.

"Maybe we can rent a car." 

Quistis turned from the map and looked in the opposite direction as Rinoa. "I don't think so. Look."

Rinoa followed where the SeeD was pointing, her line of sight eventually fell upon a stable on the far end of the station.

"Chocobos, great," Rinoa said, with less than enthusiasm in her voice.

Quistis smiled at her. "I hope you can ride, because that looks like our only way around here."

"We'll find out." Rinoa sighed in resignation. "Come on, let's get going."

Rinoa headed off toward the stables, hoping beyond hope that she would be in time. She wasn't sure what she was racing toward, but she knew that Squall needed her.  


	3. Crimson Snow

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Final Fantasy VIII. All such characters are copyrighted property of Squaresoft.

**Snows of Winter, Rains of Spring**

By Joshua Reardon

**Chapter 3: Crimson Snow**

Slowly coming out of darkness, Squall awoke to a world of blossoming pain and exploding agony.

Squinting at the light filtering through the pines, he found himself on his side, lying in the snow beneath a massive fir tree, the green needles contrasting with the snow all around him that was stained in his blood. He had to laugh, the red and the green, it was absurdly like Christmas.

Trying to prop himself up brought a gasp, as sharp pain lanced through his side. He tried again, wincing through it. He got to his knees and reached out to steady himself on the tree behind him. He found his arm hanging limply at his side, dislocated at the shoulder. He pulled himself to his feet and felt the throb in his side. He opened his jacket to find a gash as long as his fore-arm, crossing him from pelvis to sternum, blood streaming from the wound like a leaky tap. A large bruise was forming on the other side, broken ribs probably, and not just a few. Grunting in determination he turned himself toward the tree and steadied himself with his good arm. Clenching his jaw and throwing all his weight into the motion, he rammed his shoulder against the tree. His vision went dark at the edges as a wave of agony swept through him and a ragged cry was ripped from his throat to reverberate in the empty stillness. He heard a distinct pop as bone ground against cartilage. Leaning against the tree, he could feel the bark like tiny needles against his face. Breathing heavy, flecks of blood flying from his mouth, he tried to steady himself. He knew that if he blacked out now, he would never wake up again. Through shear force of will he was able to stay conscious as a dull throb took root in his shoulder. At least he could actually move it though.

Once his vision had cleared, he looked around at the encroaching forest. Snow covered everything in a white fluffy blanket, perfectly hugging the forest floor. He looked at his feet and found a gathering circle of red stained flakes. Not ten feet from the base of the tree was Lion Heart, sticking from the earth like Excalibur from the stone, blue steel shining in the morning light even through the black ichor etching the blade.

He stumbled toward the sword. Leaning on it for support, he tried to gather his bearings. His mind could recall the events of the battle, but it was like a lazy fog that was slowly burning off in the mid-day sun. Nothing looked familiar, so he gave a best guess and began walking.

_'Hyne'_, he thought, _'how far did I fly?'_

                                                *          *          *          *

It moved so fast, striking with lightning speed. Squall barely had time to register that the beast had moved before the jaws were enclosing him. With reflexes honed from an entire lifetime of training, Squall brought his gunblade up in a quick slash, scoring the fiend along the jaw. A quick pull of the trigger, and energy flashed along the blade in a bang that resonated through the trees. The blade bit deep and black ichor splashed Squall along the arm, steam rising in the cold, even as the beast snapped its head back. It let out a roar of pain before settling back and staring at Squall. A great tongue, slick with saliva, slid out of its jaws and licked the wound

Once again, a hollow voice echoed in Squall's mind. _'You can sting man-thing, but do you believe that you can defeat me with that tiny piece of metal?_'

"I can try." He squared his shoulders and went into a defensive stance, his gunblade down low, but at the ready.

'_You cannot stand against me_', the beast bellowed in Squall's mind, as steam arose from its nostrils. _'I am Melfistadon, greatest of Ruby Dragons. I am mankind's destroyer, preparing the way for the King's return!'_

Squall could only stare at this great monster. It began to thrash in anticipation, snapping its jaw and raking its talons. What had it meant by 'King's return'?

Squall stared up at the beast, defiance plainly written on his face.

"Whatever."

The dragon roared in anger, its bellow sounded like a thunderclap. Squall's knees almost buckled, only shear willpower kept him standing, even as his insides quaked.

Melfistadon reared up on his hind legs and began to inhale. Even as Squall saw the motion he began to run. Desperately sprinting through the brush, he reached deep into his mind, unlocking his junctioned magic. The pink magic shell was just beginning to form around him as he felt a blast of hot air from behind him. The shell had fully formed as the ball of fire overtook him, blowing him off his feet and into a spinning tumble. He could feel the shell straining against the dragonfire, barely keeping the flames from searing his flesh to ash. He landed hard, trailing a line through the snow. He got up slowly, even as his mind screamed for him to move faster.

He was barely standing when the dragon dropped out of the sky. It landed hard and fast, sending a shockwave reverberating out from the impact. Squall again was thrown into the air, trailing behind the snow and dirt and trees. Gripping tight to Lion Heart, he tried to twist around to land on his feet and saw that this time Melfistadon had followed him. Lightning quick, the dragon stretched out an arm toward Squall even as he flew through the air. A massive talon raked his side, digging deep into flesh and batting him against a tree. He scrambled to his feet and gripped Lion Heart even tighter as blood poured out of the wound to soak his now tattered jacket.

Knowing he had to take the offensive, Squall charged toward the creature, adrenaline fighting fiercely to keep him from passing out. The dragon roared and snaked another arm forward to take Squall's head. Once again reaching deep into his mind, Squall summoned forth a glowing blue shield before him, just as Melfistadon's talons came racing in. The massive claws raked deep furrows into the protection spell but did not penetrate, even as Lion Heart came up to bite deep into the dragon's foot. A pull of the renzokuken and electrical fire raced along the blade of Lion Heart, slicing into the foot and taking one of the talons off at the knuckle. Hot bloody gore drenched Squall as the dragon let out a roar of anguish.

The dragon pulled back snaked its body around. Moving faster than Squall could imagine for a creature that size, its massive tail came around in a whip like motion, scattering trees and snow in a great sweep. The tail took Squall in the side. It was like being hit with a giant log. Squall went flying through the air once more to smack viciously into a large boulder, his head cracking against the unforgiving stone. Black flecks swam before his eyes as darkness closed in around him. His side was on fire and he could barely breathe. He could taste the salty, metallic tang of blood in his mouth and his nostrils were filled with the vile smell of the monsters gore.

A small voice in his head warred with the overwhelming urge to let the darkness overtake him. The voice kept repeating a single word until it was a deafening cacophony, drowning out the call to rest.

"Rinoa."

He got to his feet, his back to the boulder. Somehow, one hand still gripped Lion Heart, so tight he could barely feel it anymore. Stubbornly, he set his shoulders. His vision cleared just in time to see the dragon.

Like quicksilver, the beast snaked its head in and clamped its teeth on the fringes of Squall's clothes.

_'Now you die man-thing!'_

Straight up Squall flew as Melfistadon tossed him like a rag doll for his amusement. As he reached his apogee, he twisted enough to see the dragon opening it jaws and inhaling.  High above the trees, plummeting like a rock toward gaping jaws, he had but seconds to react. Steeling himself, he reversed his grip on Lion Heart and reached into his mind one last time for the magic that was lying there, waiting for him. Reaching his hand forward, wind streaking past his outstretched fingers, he called forth the magic. The air tingled with energy and the smell of ozone filled his nostrils as lightning streaked from his hand to strike the great beast.

Melfistadon roared in pain as the lighting racked his great body, causing spasms of pain. Arching his neck, he presented his open stomach to the plummeting Squall.

Dropping like a stone, Squall slammed into the dragon's upper chest, Lion Heart digging deep, as the renzokuken flashed. Like a knife through butter, Squall let Lion Heart and gravity trace a line in blood from the beast's chest down to its stomach. Hot black ichor sprayed like a jet, almost burning him. 

As the monster's stomach was pierced, the furnace that fueled the dragon's deadly fire breath burst, exploding like napalm. Squall flew through the air like a broken rag doll, limbs flailing. His magical shell evaporated as the fire ball overtook him, charring his clothes.

Flying uncontrollably through the air, he collided with a large fir, smacking his shoulder into the evergreen. With deadened fingers, Lion heart slipped from his grasp even as he fell in a crumpled heap at the base of the tree.

Darkness once again encroached and this time, he let what felt like sweet soft arms enfold him and hold him close. She was there with him, he was sure of it. There was no more pain, no more stench of death. Just her silky touch, and lilac smell. 

                                                *          *          *          *

To Squall, it seemed like days that he had been walking, but the sun had barely moved over the tops of the trees since he had started out from the fir.

He knew he didn't have much time. His head was throbbing with a dull ache, matched only by the pain in his shoulder. His side burned like fire from the gash, and it was still bleeding, even though he had tried to wrap it tight with his shirt. Still, every step had more of his precious lifeblood seeping out of the wound to leave a crimson trail in the snow.

His head throbbed so fiercely he couldn't concentrate long enough to draw forth even the simplest of curative spells, and his small stock of potions had been destroyed when the great beast's tail had taken him in the ribs, breaking at least three. He needed medical attention soon, or he'd never see her again. It was that thought, more than any actual desire to live that kept him putting one foot in front of the other.

Once again her face swam into his vision, her hair floating like a dark cloud, framing her features.

He shook away the hallucination before he stumbled. If he fell, he knew he would never get up again.

He ran a gloved hand through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes. He was covered in sweat in minus 25 degree weather. He had to get back to the town.

The sky slowly began to darken as clouds rolled in over the mountains. Snowflakes began to fall lazily around him as he trudged his way through the underbrush. The falling snow soon began to obscure his vision.

A keening howl suddenly broke the stillness. Squall whipped around in the direction of the cry. Listening closely, he could hear the sound of many feet, paws more like, churning the snow of the forest floor. Cursing the open wound in his side, he turned and fled in the opposite direction, moving as fast as his condition would allow.

Every stride brought a new gasp of pain as more of his precious lifeblood spilled on the forest floor. As long as the blood kept flowing, he would never lose the animals. Seeing a clearing ahead through a swirl of snowflakes, he darted through the tree-line.

Bursting into the clearing, he dashed for the centre and turned to make his stand, gripping Lion Heart fiercely in one hand, the other pressed firmly against the deep gash in his side.

Slowly creeping into the clearing came the Worgs. Parting from the tree-line like flowing shadows, they moved into a circle around Squall. 

Something more than mere wolves, the worgs moved with a grace that belied their large frames. Squall could see sinewy muscles ripple underneath the fur coats as they slowly closed in on him. Jaws began to snap, and dripping fangs were bared as growls issued forth from the creatures throats. One of the worgs moved forward further than the rest, obviously the alpha male from the silvery markings on his mostly black frame.

The sky began to darken even more. As black clouds rolled overhead, snow began to fall in a frenzy.

The lead worg began to circle Squall, eyeing him with a look of hunger. Pain engulfing his body, black specks once again swimming in his vision, the SeeD commander could only set his shoulders and stand ready. He would not be an easy kill for this pack of hunters.

In one fluid motion, the worg sprang at Squall, jaw gaping and teeth bared. With the last of his remaining strength, he brought Lion Heart up into the beast's stomach, even as the jaws of the monster clamped around his good shoulder. As the fangs of the worg sank down to bone, Squall pulled the trigger on his gunblade. The renzokuken flashed as sword pierced muscle and bone. The momentum of the beast's charge carried them over with the worg landing firmly on top of Squall. They crashed to the ground, the worg a dead weight on Squall's frame.

Pushing the bloody creature off of him brought more grunts of pain as the torn flesh of his shoulder began to spurt bright red blood.

Dislodging his sword from the carcass, he gazed around at the pack. They began to snarl viciously, snapping jaws and pawing the ground. They would all spring at once, he knew, and he would be torn to pieces.

The last of his strength gone, his breath came in ragged gasps. He had gone so far beyond pain all he felt now was hollow, empty. He could let them take him. It would be over fast, and he could finally rest. He fell to his knees to wait for the end blow.

All at once, the sky became black as night. Dark lightning flashed in the clouds above. Streaks of black fire struck the ground all around Squall, blasting earth, snow and worg all around in a mad frenzy. In the eye of the storm Squall knelt, as the monsters were blown apart by black energy from the sky. Bright spots of violet burned into his vision as lightning strike after lightning strike fell to the ground.

Dark energy crackled around the atmosphere as a shape emerged from the low-hanging clouds. It lowered slowly into view, drifting down on leathery black wings. Coming into view, Squall could make out its shape. It wore the body of a man, although with talons on hands and feet, and the head and mane of a lion.

Squall had seen this creature only once before, but had seen its image everyday of his life. It was the same image that was currently draped around his neck, and on the finger of his left hand.

Griever.

As the beast floated above Squall, black lightning crackled around its frame, its mane swirling in the dark energies as its leathery wings beat the wind.

Squall could only stare at the greatest of Guardian Forces. What was it doing here now, in the present? The last he had seen this great creature it had been junctioned to the sorceress at the end of time, Ultimecia. She had been defeated in that far off time and place, and he had thought Griever had simply returned to the aether that all GF's come from. 

Time seemed to slow around him as thunder echoed in his mind, and another voice broke into his thoughts.

_'You cannot die here Lionheart,'_ the voice rang with the sound of a hundred cannons firing. _'You must prepare for the King's return, for his coming signals the doom of your world.'_

"Who is this King? How can I hope stop something so powerful? Why me!?!" Squall shouted the questions up at the great beast, but even before the last word was out of his mouth, the creature was already fading into mist.

Watching as Griever melted into the very air around him, time resumed its normal flow.

The sky returned slowly to the lazy grey cloud cover that had prevailed all morning. Snow fell idly once more, no longer swirling violently, more content just to fall and settle as a blanket on the landscape.

Squall stared around in amazement, taking in the scene of carnage.

Charred pieces of worg lay scattered everywhere. The earth was blown apart in great holes, chunks of ground flung into the air to settle around the clearing.

Pain began to settle once more on Squall like an old blanket. Blood ran in rivulets from his shoulder and side, soaking his tattered clothes and the snow around him. Slumping down from exhaustion, he could no longer struggle to keep from succumbing to the darkness. As blackness engulfed his vision, his head came to rest in the cold, freshly fallen flakes, and he wondered if this was the last time he would have to lie in crimson snow.


	4. Fallen

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Final Fantasy VIII. All such characters are copyrighted property of Squaresoft.

**Snows of Winter, Rains of Spring**

By Joshua Reardon

**Chapter 4: Fallen**

Rinoa didn't think she could be in any more pain. Between the frigid temperatures of the Trabian wilderness and the constant beating from the chocobo saddle, she was sure it was only a matter of time before her entire body crumbled from the constant bouncing. Her knees were sore from constantly gripping the giant bird, and she was sure the bird held no love for her because of it. Four times it had craned its neck around and warked at her for squeezing too tight.

She looked over at Quistis and could only wish she had as much poise in the saddle. Quistis seemed to flow with the chocobo, riding expertly, barely needing to use the reins, letting her knees do most of the steering. Whereas Rinoa, by contrast, had to yank on the reins each time she tried to turn the stupid bird so hard she was constantly almost falling out of the saddle, which made her grip her knees harder, which made the bird wark at her even more. She didn't know how she had gotten locked in this vicious cycle, but she swore that this was the first and last time she would ever ride a chocobo.

She wouldn't complain though. She flat out refused to, especially in front of the blond SeeD. It was her idea to go on this excursion and she wasn't going to let a little pain deter her from finding out if Squall was alright. In light of her nightmare, she _couldn't_ let it.

Trying to take her mind off the numbing agony in her posterior, she opened the holo-map once more and checked their position. The glowing red dot was moving in a jagged line as they wove their way through the Mjornir foothills.

She turned her attention away from the map toward Quistis.

"How much longer before we pick up his locator signal?" she asked the older girl.

Quistis reined in her chocobo and turned her attention, which had been focused on the surrounding forest, to Rinoa.

"We have to be within a couple kilometers, roughly. It's not too exact. Might be even less out here what with all the hills blocking the signal. This would have been a lot easier if we could have flown the Ragnarok here" she answered, thinking wistfully.

"Tell me about it." Rinoa couldn't help agreeing. "Why would Squall have taken the ship instead of just scheduling a drop off and pick up?"

"Probably because he was too busy running to think. When Squall desperately wants to get away from something he doesn't give two thoughts to his actions." As soon as the words were out of Quistis' mouth she wanted to take them back. Wincing she looked to Rinoa.

"Rin, I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" She couldn't finish the sentence. There was a flash of pain across the small brunette girls face and then she turned her head away.

"It's… it's alright. I know I scared him away, I just don't know what I did." Her voice sounded on the verge of cracking. 

A minute of silence passed between the two girls before Quistis tentatively spoke again.

"Why don't we rest the birds for a few minutes? I saw a stream over this way. Besides my butt is killing me"

Leading the chocobos toward the stream, Rinoa looked around at the forest, taking some relief from the serene setting. The trees weren't packed so tight that you couldn't see through them, but even so it was hard to glimpse more than a hundred meters in the distance. Boughs of evergreens were laden full with snow, pulled down by the weighty blankets. A small brook cut through the tree line, ice encroaching on the edges of the water.

Dismounting, the two women led the great birds to the water to drink. Letting the reins go, they moved off a small ways, the chocobos trained enough to know not to move more than a few feet from where they were left.

Brushing the snow away from a spot on the ground, Quistis laid some dead wood on the spot and reached deep into her mind. A small puff of flame burst into being, igniting even the wet wood. Soon enough, she had a small fire going, enough to provide some heat at least. Crouching down, the girls warmed themselves by the heat of the flame, even as snowflakes continued to fall lazily around them.

As the heat from the fire began to dispel some of the cold that had settled into there bones, Rinoa took time to reflect on their situation. She was out in the middle of nowhere, searching for the proverbial needle in a haystack, with her former rival, Quistis Trepe. Why was she here, why had she come with her? Rinoa didn't relish the thought of asking her, but if she didn't, it would only eat at her, devouring her piece of mind. Taking a long sigh, she turned to the older girl.

"Why are you here Quistis?"

Quistis looked at her blankly for a moment, and then smirked "I thought we went over this on the train. I practically twisted your arm."

Rinoa shook her head. "No, not how you came to be here. Why. Why did you come with me? Any of the others could have come to keep me out of trouble."

The SeeD looked down, and then away. Silence was the only answer to Rinoa's query.

Dreading the answer, Rinoa asked quietly, "Are you still in love with him?"

Quistis began to rub her arms, as if the chill had once more settled into her bones. When she finally turned back to Rinoa, her eyes were filled with unshed tears.

"Yes."

Silence stretched between them as Rinoa digested what she had already suspected. A suspicion had been growing in her mind that Quistis still harboured feelings for Squall, feelings that were much deeper than just love for a friend. They had been spending more time together as Squall had finally relaxed around the blond instructor, now that there was no potential for romantic involvement. All platonic to Squall, but had that truly been Quistis' intent?

"I…I can't change the way I feel about him Rin. You don't know how many times I've wished that it had been me that he had danced with that night at the graduation ball," Quistis confessed quietly, lifting a weight that had been on her chest for too long. "But you have to understand, I'd never do anything to come between you." She paused to gather her strength, feeling her will to continue ebbing with every word. "I don't think it would work even if I tried. He can only see you no matter where he looks." Looking down to the fire, she whispered, "I just want him to be happy."

"Oh Hyne, Quistis I'm sorry," Rinoa began, tilting her head back, looking to the sky for answers. "I didn't mean to push it like this, I just…- is the sky getting darker?"

Her question caught Quistis off-guard. Looking skyward as well, She could see dark clouds massing and black lightning began to criss-cross the sky. Definitely not normal weather patterns. She jumped to her feet, shaking off the oppressiveness of her feelings as her SeeD training went into motion.

She held out her hand toward Rinoa. "Give me the map, quickly!"

Hurriedly reaching into her coat pocket, she brought forth the small organizer, almost fumbling it into the fire in her haste.

With a quick snag, Quistis saved the organizer from a slow melt and opened up the holographic map display.

There on the holo were two dots. The red dot was there, indicating their current position, and a blue dot, very close, indicating a SeeD homing beacon.

Rinoa bounded to her feet and stared at the projection.

"Is that him? Did we find him?" She asked tentatively.

"We haven't found him yet, but we will." Quistis replied, confidence steeling her voice. "He's still about 6 clicks from here. We could be there within the hour if we hurry."

Quickly kicking snow onto the flames, Rinoa rushed toward the chocobos even as the wisps of steam were still rising from the fire. The girls speedily mounted the great birds after only a minor fuss from Rinoa's chocobo at being subjected to her knees once again.

As the sky darkened almost to pitch and black lightning began to streak the sky, Rinoa could only hope that whatever the phenomenon was, it had nothing to do with Squall.

                                                *          *          *          *

They burst into the clearing at almost a gallop, forcing the chocobos as fast as they dared through the treacherous, snow covered terrain. Looking at the map, the two dots were almost completely overlapping, the red mixing with the blue to form an incandescent purple. Reining the chocobos in sharply, the girls slowly began to trot around the clearing, as flakes of white drifted all around them.

Spotting something strange covered in snow, Quistis dismounted and made her way toward the peculiarity. Bending down, she wiped fresh fallen snow from the object. Brushing one final handful away, she jumped back, startled. Glazed over eyes looked back at her from the furry head of a quite dead worg, the yellow beads staring into the distance. Looking around at the clearing, she noticed other piles of fresh snow, as well as large mounds of earth, scattered in no particular pattern. Now that she concentrated, she could smell the faint waft of burnt hair and ozone. Lightning? What had happened here?

Quistis turned to see Rinoa also dismounted and inspecting the carnage.

"There're quite a few dead fiends here by the look of it," she shouted across to Rinoa. "The map says he's supposed to be here," she once again opened the holographic display. "Do you think one of these creatures could have ripped the tracker off him?"

Rinoa didn't hear the question. Something was drawing her inexorably toward the centre of the clearing. She looked down at a large mound of snow. Something had flashed a metallic glint. Looking closer, a gasp escaped her lips as she saw a silver chain, and recognized the metallic lion's head emblazoned on the pendant.

"Squall!" Hurriedly, she threw herself to the ground and began to wipe the snow from his all too still form. "Wake up Squall, you have to wake up!" she began to shake him as tears started to run in rivulets down her smooth cheeks. Brushing away the freshly fallen flakes revealed a mass of crimson stained snow all around him.

Quistis had heard her cry from the other side of the clearing and had come running, barely even noticing the numerous mounds of snow that were obviously more dead worgs.

"Oh Hyne," Reaching Squall's body, she gently pushed Rinoa aside and quickly began to examine his body. She found a gash as long as her forearm in his side, and his shoulder was open to the bone. "What happened here?" She looked at Rinoa, fear deep in her blue eyes.

"I don't know," Rinoa almost screamed at the blond SeeD. "Quistis, he's not moving and I don't even know if he's breathing!" Rinoa couldn't comprehend how this could be happening. Everything was unfolding just like her dream foretold. 

Quistis reached to Squall's neck to check for a pulse, any indication that the spark of life still burned in his body. Her heart was pounding so hard she could hear the intense beat resonating in her ears. Holding her breath, she counted in her head while she waited for a beat to pulse beneath her fingertips. A wave of relief washed over her as she felt the faintest of beats, soon replaced by the almost complete loss of hope.

On the verge of tears, she turned toward Rinoa.

"He's alive, but he's so close to death there's …there's nothing I can do." She choked back a sob and continued. "My magic just isn't strong enough to help him." Tears ran freely down her face now, as she was wracked by emotional pain. She covered her face in her hands and started to weep quietly.

"I can heal him."

Quistis brought her head up and looked at Rinoa quizzically.

"I think I can cast a powerful enough healing spell, but I …I don't know if I could control it." Looking down, she finished in a whisper, "I could kill him."

"What do you mean, you might not be able to control it?" Quistis began to question her, her voice sounding desperate.

"I mean just that. I've never had to channel that much magic before, not even when we fought Ultimecia. I can feel how hurt he is Quistis, in my mind. That much power could grow out of my control!"

"Then don't do it." Quistis looked at her firmly, determination setting into her features. "We'll get him to the town and help him there. "

"Quistis, there's no time. He'll never make it to the village. Just because you can't help him doesn't mean I can't!"

Even as the words left her mouth she wanted them back. She saw the hurt and anger on Quistis' face and knew that she had stepped over a line she didn't mean to cross.

Quistis glared at her in indignation. Fury rising in the pit of her stomach, and most of it was directed at herself. Rinoa was right. Quistis had wanted to be the one to heal Squall, to be the one who had saved him, the one he owed his life to. Realizing it made her sick to her stomach, that she could sink so low at a time like this. She cast her eyes to the still overcast sky. Snowflakes floated before her face. She looked at Rinoa with a gaze steeled by years of bitter disappointment.

"Do it."

Rinoa moved over to Squall, placing her small hands on his head. His skin was so cold, and his hair was frozen into clumps where the blood had matted his brown locks. Once she had run her fingers through those lustrous strands, reveling in the feel of it. The lips she had once kissed were ice blue. She bent down to place a kiss on those lips, salty tears mingling with the taste.

"I love you."

White light erupted all around them, searing in its intensity. Quistis had to close her eyes at the blinding light. She forced them open as she heard a gasp of breath. She saw Squall's body spasm as the healing energies washed over him in a tidal wave, knitting flesh and bone back together in a searing agony of holy light. Quistis could almost imagine she saw a face, angelic in its beauty, reach down and breathe the kiss of life into Squall's body. Just as quickly as she imagined it, the world exploded again in a bathing light, blowing Quistis on her back as the shockwave washed over her.

Light turned to darkness and then to light once more as her vision came back. Bright spots swam in her line of sight. Looking over to where Squall and Rinoa were, she saw white feathers float to the ground around the two. 

Rinoa looked down to see Squall stir slightly, and open his eyes. Tears filled her vision and her voice almost broke as she whispered to him. 

"Thought you could get away from me did you?" she said jokingly, a wide smile making her face luminous even as choking sobs escaped her.

Squall looked up at her, sleep threatening to draw him in before he could say a word.

"Rinoa?" he whispered, his voice weak. "I'm sorry, I should have-." He tried to continue, but she put a finger to his lips.

Smiling at him, she reached down and kissed him once more. "Just be quiet, and rest." _'Just like him'_ she thought, _'still trying. Near death and still trying.'_

With that, Squall passed into unconsciousness once more.

Quistis slowly made her way toward the lovers. Reaching down, she put her hand on Rinoa's shoulder.

"Will he be alright?"

Rinoa looked up at the blond SeeD. "He'll be fine." she said, smiling. "He just needs to rest. He lost a lot of blood."

"Are _you_ alright?" she asked the young brunette, "You look pretty worn out."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a …bit…woozy…" Slumping over Squall, Rinoa too succumbed to unconsciousness.

Sighing, Quistis merely shook her head.

"What am I gonna do with you two?"

                                                *          *          *          *  


End file.
